The Party’s Over

(Originally Posted: Friday February 05, 2010)

Real football is done until next September. I know what your thinking, “Hey Couch, what about the Super Bowl? It’s the most watched game of the year!” That’s true, but to me the NFL season truly ends on Championship Sunday. Now don’t get me wrong, I enjoy Super Bowl Sunday as much as the next guy. I think the day after should be a federally mandated hangover holiday, but it’s not a football Sunday that you know and love the rest of the season. No way, no how.

Watching the Super Bowl is its own unique entity from the way you watch football the rest of the season. You don’t regularly watch football with a dozen people, have a huge spread and have to explain to Aunt Kathleen what the yellow line on the field means. There are no block pools or jell-o shots during your regular football viewing experience. (If there are, how about dropping an invite to your ol’ buddy the Couch?) That’s why in reality, as real fans, our football season ended when the Saints kicker split the uprights two weeks ago.

Last Sunday was the most depressing day of the year. The first Sunday in 20 some odd weeks without football. (If anyone tries to mention the Pro Bowl to me, I’m going to ban them from my site. Don’t worry, I don’t actually know how to do that.) It was like walking out of a bar at 5 in the morning, after a great night of boozing, and the rising sun slapping you in the face. I was disoriented, I didn’t know what to do. I wondered around the house from television to television turning them on hoping that they would have a game or pre-game show on. What I would have given to see Cowher and Marino laughing incessantly at their own stupid jokes.

Finally, reality sunk in. There was no football to find. There was no acceptable excuse to start drinking at noon. The long harsh off-season was upon us. I settled in and started flipping through the channels. Man, I forgot how bad Sunday television was. Now with the bonus of having little kids, watching any decent or decently bad action movies were off the table as well.

I craved competition. I needed to see people compete against each other at the highest level. Did I turn on basketball or hockey? Of course not. Did I sink as low as bowling? Child please. No, at 1:33 on a Sunday, one week removed from the zenith of the NFL season, yours truly was watching a cake decorating/baking competition (not even sure what the proper name for it is) on the Food Network. And I was so into it, I was this close to getting on my laptop to see if I could find an offshore betting site where I could do some wagering. I had these teams handicapped down to a tee. (Later found out that it was a rerun, so betting would have been futile, but that’s beyond the point)

After coming to my senses and turning off the Food Network, I somehow made it through the rest of the day with a mix of napping and spending time with my kids (weird, I know.) But it wasn’t over. I did spend part of Monday explaining the cake decorating/baking show to Nerds Fantasy Football League Champion BooYah (I’m required to use his full title whenever referring to him), and he was equally enthralled.

I guess there are two problems going on right now. First, it takes a couple weeks to get used to the fact that there are no football games being played. The NFL makes it so much worse on you by playing games on Sunday AND Saturday during the last few weeks of the post season. Getting back into off-season weekend routine takes at least a month. Sometimes longer.

The other current problem is the lack of movement on any off-season news. Everything is frozen. We hear the predictable rumors coming out of the Eagles front office that McNabb isn’t going anywhere. Which you may be dumb enough to believe until you hear the same exact thing about Vick. We hear rumors that Westbrook may retire, but nothing’s happening. The Eagles are hiring scouts and assistant coaches, but who can get excited about that?

Fret not loyal readers. After the Super Bowl ends (Go Colts, by the way. You gotta root for Peyton), the off-season will start flowing crap through a goose, and so will my columns. (Hopefully, that’s the last time I compare my writing to crap, but probably not.)

I started writing this blog at the beginning of the year, and the Eagles season ended the following Saturday. My goal during the off-season will be to write two columns a week, one Eagles related and one on football in general. Even though it may be hard to tell, it’s not an anti-Favre site (solely.) And the rumors of this site changing its name to are just not true.

About Bill

A man in search of a mission at the age of 40.
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